Who better to go on a self care date with than you? Only your favorite activities. Your favorite foods. And some quality time working on your most important relationship, your relationship with you! So, get ready because we are going to plan the ultimate solo self care date.
What is a Solo Self Care Date?
Well it is exactly like it sounds. It is a scheduled date you set up with yourself. During this date you are going to treat yourself like a princess. You can go out and do your favorite things. Stay in and eat your favorite foods. Or treat yourself to a spa day. Whatever sounds good to you. Why? Because your relationship with yourself deserves some attention. We spend a lot of time and effort planning quality time with our loved ones but we rarely spend even a fraction of the effort nurturing our relationship with ourselves. I am here to tell you it is time to get comfortable (and uncomfortable) with yourself and one way we can do that is by planning a solo self care date.
How to Plan a Solo Self Care Date
Set a Date
I know you. You will tell yourself you will do it but you will let your to do list take over and never find the time. Am I right? That is why we need to set a date for our date. Pick a day that is meaningful to you, maybe your birthday, or a day that is convenient, (like next Tuesday?). What matters here is you set the date and show yourself the respect to keep it. You would never bow out on a scheduled lunch with your Mom, would you? Don’t you deserve the same amount of love?
Pick an Activity
The possibilities are endless here. You can go as fancy or as laid back as you want. You will want to pick an activity you can do solo (and by solo I mean it is okay if there are other people around but you should not bring a friend along). Is there an art gallery you have been meaning to check out but whenever you suggest it your partner kind of turns their nose up at it? Or do you want to pack a French inspired picnic to take to the beach? More of a homebody? Perhaps you want to send your family to the park for the afternoon so you can spend some quiet time at home all by yourself?
Have a Journal Ready
The main goal of this date is to get to know yourself better. What better way than to have a conversation? You could have a literal conversation with yourself if you want but I find it easier (and less awkward) to talk to myself by writing in a journal. Here are a few prompts to get you started:
- What does your dream day look like?
- What are your values and does your current life reflect those values?
- How would you describe yourself? How would others describe you?
- Make a list of all your favorite things (it might be harder than you think)
- What anxieties have come up during this experience?
Dress for the Occasion
If you are anything like me, your closet consists of clothes you wear everyday and clothes you wear when you “go out”. If your solo date consists of “going out” activities, spend some extra care in picking an outfit. Dress to impress yourself, if you like to dress up. If you are more of a comfy, casual person, dress in a way that makes you feel great. Staying in? Pick your most luxuriously cozy clothing items to really get into the self care mood.
Make it a Regular Thing
After your solo date, how do you feel? Are you eager to try it again? Perhaps it felt a bit weird? Either way, make this a regular thing. It will get easier with practice. If you feel a bit anxious about going out on a date in public on your own, start with solo dates at home and work your way up to the more public date-dates.
Remind yourself no one cares if you show up to lunch or the museum on your own. That feeling everyone is looking at you is in your head. How do I know that? Ask yourself how many times you have noticed someone out and about on their own and though “OMG, what a loser. She is eating lunch alone.” I bet your answer will be never. And, since this isn’t the high school cafeteria, I think it is a pretty safe bet no one else is thinking that either.
So go out, or stay in, and enjoy your time with that one person who deserves your love and often doesn’t get enough of it – Y.O.U.
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